Its terrifying how quickly worlds can take a turn, and strange to fathom that as much control as we can have over our own fates, as much power as our imaginations have to shape the outside world, the unrelenting current of the reality outside of our own minds is a devastating force by which everything one has worked to bring life to can be drowned.
I put myself in a position where I may have compromised bonds with people, where I feel vulnerable, and shaken from of the oblivion I put myself near this past weekend. And its just one more frightening reminder to stay buried in my work, to stay immersed in creation. I have a fire within me, an inferno, and if channeled and guided wisely, it can be an indomitable force of benevolence and creation. For the most part that is the direction I channel that energy. But when the reigns are loosened, and my mind is compromised, and whether it be drunk off rage, or inebriated and dulled by some other impetus, that fire is more prone to being unleashed, unchecked, and wreak havoc on the world around me, which in turn has devastating power to endanger the world within me.
I see the fire, and I need to tend to it accordingly.
Of the lows I did experience this weekend, there were also highs, an I did feel the benefits of this particular regiment of writing. Daily practice keeps my brain sharp, and I experience more often moments of augmented mental flow, how do I describe it? A euphoric sense of control and power over my own mind, and a sharp capacity to express precisely and eloquently what I’m thinking and feeling.
8/1/2017 4:56 am